Sometimes it feels like a joke that this is 2021. In fact, it is funnier that we survived 2020 only to kind of start it a new. Every day, I ask myself, what’s the difference? I thought it would the ‘won’. I mean the ‘one’. But no, we won not. We are far from it. 2020 is a number different from 2021 but everything similar. It feels like a joke to be in a situation where you’re not sure if Covid is getting eradicated or you. It is a joke that Kenya is a great country which, at the moment, has nothing good to be talked about. If you ask me to praise Kenya then I would, but I will stop where Kibaki stepped down. After him, it’s been jokes, and cluelessness. And noise. Empty debes. I’m tempted to say my country has no leader, or leaders, but that would almost sound like treason. I want to convince everyone that we lack a president, or rather a leader on that chair, but I won’t. Not now. For a reason- I am nobody (in politics) and mine would be easy. I won’t even make it to my local radio station like Msando, or the girl Sharon that Obado…
So, do I love Kenya? Yes. Do I hate her? Yes. I hate its politics. I hate the corruption in it. The dirt it’s clayed itself with. I hate she has leaders and lacks leadership. I hate. I haaaate!
I haven’t written for a while now, because I had sworn never to write of politics. But it affects me, and you. And I can’t write of Clementine, not when she comes from Kajiado, or Nakuru. Or Nairobi. I cannot write to promote my friends’ businesses and hustles. Not when it is affected. I cannot even write about travelling or partying or school… all because of the leadership in my country- actually, the jokes in my country. The jokers in it. I hate this hell blazing on us.
Let me share the dangerous thoughts I have about this land. And I am warning myself because this will have a thin line between being a patriot and a renegade. But either way, let’s go;
Each time I celebrate 1963, I feel void. I feel nothing. I mean, I respect those that fought for whatever they fought for. They fought for the ownership of their land. Respect! But not independence. I don’t feel any independence around here. I don’t know how close freedom is to us but it’s yet to come. Do you sometimes hate the media house for kind of taking sides in some competition? When they are supposed to be neutral? When a TV stations, intelligently, sells one politician over another during an election? Sometimes I effin blame them. Sometimes I don’t. When I don’t, it’s because I tend to believe that they’ve never actually been free. Our media houses are not free.
This is what I believe happened in 1963; oppressors and slave masters changed location. Slavery and oppression did not. We never gained freedom. We never are independent. Do white men still run organizations and companies in our land? Damn yes. Do our leaders worship the Western side? Hell Yes!
Are we independent? Nope. 1963 was the year the oppressors changed their skin colour. I can see that now.
Hahahahaha. I just laughed. I remembered something; the day our top leader was asked, on national TV, what people are going to remember about him and his government in decades to come. Haahahaha. He said;
“I am the first sitting president to vie, lose and accept. I am the first president to vie, win, have the election nullified, and accept…”
Hahahahahahaha. That’s what the health workers, who are underpaid and bullied each time they demonstrate, should remember him about. That’s what those kids studying under a tree should remember him about. That’s what teachers, who are the most harassed and their profession taken for granted should remember him about. That’s what the unemployed youth should remember him about. Hahahaha.
He even swanked about being the first to change the system of government- the government where corruption surpasses production. A government that’s about to have more leaders than those that are led. And truth be told, some posts are unnecessary. Some deputies are a constructive way of wasting resources. He boasts about that system of leaders who can’t lead their people.
He mentioned the SGR in the same interview. I am not mentioning anything on this. The loan borrowed for this (the most expensive project since ‘independence’), and the fact that it made a loss of KSh9. 8 billion in 2018 is heartbreaking.
He mentioned a number of things… railway sector, Kisumu port, roads… things that are good but… You see, roads are useless if they lead nowhere.
Roads are useless if there is no school that leads to.
Roads are useless if there is no good hospital that leads to.
He never mentioned a thing about education because he knows the truth…
He never mentioned a thing about health or hospitals because he knows the truth…
He never boasted about fighting corruption because he KNOWS the truth…
He would never mention anything about the economy, never ever.
Failures too great it clouds the little good done- which is why this government is hard to praise. Or vote for, again.
Which is why I can’t write anything else today. Not when the number of Covid cases increases here as it dies everywhere else around the world. Not when we are losing friends and families to ‘it could have been prevented’ kind of deaths. Not when lockdown in five counties is what our supposedly best heads consider an effective way to curb a virus. Nkt. A virus that made millionaires billionaires! When Covid arrived here, we saw a killer; a threat to our lives and society. Then my leaders saw business opportunities. Kenya!
Sometimes I want to revolt with millions of citizens.
Sometimes I want a miracle to happen when I wake up.
Sometimes I want them exited from…
Most times I wish I wasn’t Kenyan
Most times I work to have dual citizenship, just in case things get worse (aren’t they already?).
Most times I want to go back to before this government. Or to the future after it (hopping it’s better).
I wish things change.
I wish things change soon.
But if they don’t
Then hey fellow citizens,
Just like Hartley, when he remained behind to play “Nearer My God to Thee”
In the Titanic movie, before the water swallowed them
I say this with same tone;
It’s been a pleasure suffering with you.